Becoming the best version of yourself: what if this injunction concealed another form of pressure? Behind benevolent personal development, a new demand for performance is emerging. Between constant optimization and mental fatigue, has self-help gone too far?
Social media is full of motivational quotes, tailored morning routines, and coaches who advocate constant improvement. While these messages are well-intentioned, they can sometimes trap us in a pattern of toxic demands. In a world where we must always be more beautiful, stronger, healthier, and more productive… can we still be content with simply being ourselves?
The cult of self-optimization
Initially designed to better understand and surpass oneself, personal development has mutated. For some, it has become a form of social injunction: you have to read 50 books a year, get up at 5 a.m. to meditate, keep a perfect bullet journal, exercise six times a week…
The risk? Mental fatigue disguised as a quest for well-being.
When self-help becomes counterproductive
The pressure to constantly improve can generate guilt, anxiety, and a sense of failure. We don’t meditate enough, we don’t heal fast enough, we haven’t yet reached version 3.0 of ourselves.
This overly linear discourse denies the life cycles, fluctuating emotions, and periods of stagnation necessary for personal development.
Rediscover a gentle and realistic approach
What if we relearned to listen to ourselves without forcing ourselves instead of striving to find the best version of yourself? Slow living, mental health, and self-kindness reintroduce humanity into our journeys.
Being vulnerable, setting boundaries, having “off” phases: these elements are just as important as visible successes.
Towards a non-performing personal development
New voices are rising to promote a more nuanced, more cyclical, more intuitive form of self-help. A personal development that accepts imperfection and values authenticity.
Because being yourself sometimes also means giving up the ideal version that is sold to us as a universal model.
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